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If anybody has any anarchist compatible parenting resources that specifically speak to raising kids on the autism spectrum I'd really appreciate them.
Also if folks have things their parents did that they hated lmk!

+boosts are awesome

@June @bugs what my partner and i do is called respectful parenting, and visible child

they often disagree with methods and principles, but we pick and choose from what seems most sensible / practical.

@meena are these both searchable terms or are there any specific pieces you'd recommend?

@bugs they should be very easily searchable

my partner is in Facebook groups which share their experiences

but i don't use Facebook, i can barely read! so i get most of my info from her 😅😔

I don't have any resources but as someone somewhere on the spectrum and with other MH issues, the thing I hated most was when my parents made fun of or poked fun at things I liked. I'm still afraid to unironically/unapologetically express interest in something unless I know for a fact the person I'm talking to likes the thing too.

@locrian Ugh yeah that's really awful. We both love trains and I'm a big geek but this is definitely going on my list of things to watch for in others!
Thanks for sharing

@bugs Was wracking my brain on this one... I think the old No! Against Adult Supremacy zines might have something in them. You can get them as a compilation pretty cheap. It’s not all my cup of tea but there’s some good bits in there on kids in general.

In general, every kid is different and giving them room to develop at their pace on their terms has been huge with ours. Less expectations mean less frustrations for everyone involved. Fuck outcome goals in parenting.

We’re also fortunate ours haven’t had to deal with public education and all the forced conformity that it requires even under the best circumstances. I’d imagine that’s a whole other level of shit to deal with especially with a kid on the spectrum.

@ruin Yeah school is largely at the center of this debacle. Mainly that a specific thing they does has been causing them a lot of difficulty with other people at school. Talking about things doesn't really get across, and a lot of the conventional advice is really coercive and condescending.

Taking them as they are is a pretty wonderful piece of advice, even though (or perhaps because) it's not the easiest route. Fuck teaching people to act neurotypical, fuck (ideals of) humanity, fuck the education system. Going to have to figure out terms, pay a bit more attention, and be a bit wiser about all this.

I'll have to check out those zines! Also should probably read a bit more @ crip theory stuff in general

@bugs I tend to use a similar line of thought to address the critiques of anticiv as ableist.

The entire notion of ability in modern (post)industrial society is constructed through a materialist and utilitarian view of the body as a tool for production. We are measured by our physical capability to function in school, the factory floor, the office, the (single family) home, etc.

Anyone who can argue for such a conception of human value should fuck off.

@bugs Not a parent and don't have any secondary link resources but WE ARE an autistic endogenic system with quasi-shared memory, so we can say for a fact that "because I told you so" is fucking AWFUL and annoying, and people should explain to their children (as appropriate for the individual& in question).

Which seems obvious. But we can almost guarantee people will forget at some point.

Also, because we're plural with a semi-shared memory: our skill profile is SUPER spiky because not only are we all Autistic, we're different people. And because our memory is only SEMI-shared, we may require different explanations and different levels and ways of explanation for each person if/when they didn't get the memo.

Just...HOPEFULLY that autism and anarchist friendly enough, wdk.

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