@athousandgateaux I've found that having a name for my experiences in terms of a "diagnosis" (even if it's fundamentally inadequate and it's just another stupid reductive output of the shitty biomedical model) helps me find critical literature about it that helps me understand it in ways that I've found helpful and meaningful, even if my aim isn't to "treat" my symptoms. Like I think depression is a completely inadequate and almost useless label, but I still used that label to find critical writing and views on the constellation of experiences that get labelled "depression" and that led me to reading a book on the phenomenology of depression which I found helped me understand my experiences a lot better. It felt good to be able to articulate my experiences (even if just to myself) more clearly, e.g. to be able to explain the way I feel like all the possibility in the world has been utterly foreclosed, rather than just saying "I'm sad and feel no motivation to do anything". It felt like gaining a more profound understanding of my experiences. But I guess the use in that depends on whether you feel that that sort of explanatory value is something you want. I think I'm personally driven by a curiosity of "Why do I have experiences like this when many other people don't?" and being able to contextualise my experiences like that makes me feel less alien and isolated and helpless and distressed, even if I can't do much/anything about the factors that have led me to have these experiences. But I can imagine that's not the same for everyone.
In a few short centuries, industrial civilization had spread from the western fringes of Eurasia to sprawl across the face of the planet. Plundering the soil of its riches, fouling the air, and remolding life-forms at will, this gargantuan industrial society had already peaked a thousand years after its foundation: Ahead lay abrupt and violent decline.
Some fungi from my walk in the forest the other day. Not always easy to spot these sorts of things in a beleaguered forest that is within the greater metropolitan area of a massive city and has been hugely altered and cultivated by humans for centuries, sigh.
I think the one on the right is a common earthball. Still trying to identify the ones on the left.
I find it odd and almost uncomfortable that I can't readily identify species as I didn't grow up in this country and have basically no familiarity with the species here. Not being familiar with them, with which ones are found together and how they interact, it almost feels like I don't know the local language and can't properly engage with the things around me. But I'll keep learning.
@stomachxache [The year 2121, the planet is basically entirely dead, and the majority of remaining humans are kept in pods so they can be easily drained of blood for the immortal Jeff Bezos to drink]
A Marxist in one of the pods: "The contradictions are heightening."
@stomachxache it's like they're looking for the signs/portents that their desired chain of events will finally actually be set in motion and will start to surge towards revolution, so they keep desperately hoping that the future is just around the corner if only we can hold out a little longer, not noticing that broadly this is more like a frog-in-boiling-water situation and the water has been heating up for a very long time.
Out of perverse curiosity I had a go at reading a solarpunk short story, and it mainly involved the protagonist going to a conference centre to pitch their small business idea in the hope of someone investing in their business so it could expand. Good to see as always how much the current system impoverishes people's imaginations. Cool. Great. Fantastic.
@stomachxache That is so deeply enraging. The complete lack of not even compassion but basic fundamental understanding of the reality of the situation from your boss is so horrendously dehumanising. I hope things somehow work out ok for you and the other people you care about who are in the same horrible situation.
@CriminalCabbage wouldn't be surprised if it's due to her feeling discomfort/shame about experiencing sexual desire, so she's presenting her maternal (and therefore hegemonically approved) side in an attempt to handle the cognitive dissonance. She just has no awareness of how deranged it ends up looking.
@athousandgateaux I know that place - just longing to be unconscious because then you don't have to experience the overwhelming onslaught of everything. And I know that when you're in that place, it's impossible to imagine things ever being different. But from experience, I know that things do change and being conscious starts to offer possibilities again. I hope it does so for you soon.
'Once we are divided (after us, the ones who desired it, who dared this rupture) between the not guilty (I do not say innocents)—between the not guilty who you are, and the guilty who we are, know that it is an entire life that you are leading from this side of the bars, from where you think you can, without any danger, and for your own moral comfort, hold out to us a helpinghand. As for me, I have chosen: I will be on the side of crime. And I will help the children, not to win back access to your houses, your factories, your schools, your laws and sacraments, but to destroy them.'
'So, if your soul is low, call the movement that carries the child of 15 to an offence or a crime "thoughtlessness". I will use another word. For you need a ferocious nerve, a lovely courage, to stand against a society this strong, institutions this severe, laws protected by a police whose strength is as much in the fabulous, mythical, unformed fear that it installs in the souls of children as in its organization."
Jean Genet, 'The Criminal Child'
@athousandgateaux I have that edition - feels like it's just missing a Hajime Sorayama robot on the cover.
'Hearken unto me, fellow creatures. I who have dwelt in a form unmatched with my desire, I whose flesh has become an assemblage of incongruous anatomical parts, I who achieve the similitude of a natural body only through an unnatural process, I offer you this warning: the Nature you bedevil me with is a lie. Do not trust it to protect you from what I represent, for it is a fabrication that cloaks the groundlessness of the privilege you seek to maintain for yourself at my expense. You are as constructed as me; the same anarchic womb has birthed us both. I call upon you to investigate your nature as I have been compelled to confront mine. I challenge you to risk abjections and flourish as well as have I. Heed my words, and you may well discover the seams and sutures in yourself.'
-- Susan Stryker, My Words To Victor Frankenstein Above the Village of Chamounix: Performing Transgender Rage
Art, ecology, anarchism.
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